Death & Dying

The Restlessness of Grief — Cara Heafey

Reflection for Easter Eve, ‘Holy’ Saturday The worst has happened. The disciples have fled. The cross stands bare. The tomb is sealed. Mary, dazed and exhausted by sorrow, fuggy with tears, makes her way to the grave. She doesn’t know what else to do with herself. Such is the restlessness of grief; when the wound […]

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Our dying, words of preparation — Cara Heafey

As we look back over the days we have lived May our hearts be filled with gratitude. We give thanks for each person and each moment that shaped our journey. Each brought us gifts; albeit some more welcome than others. We, too, have shaped the lives of others, in ways we may never know We […]

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Red leaf floating on lake

Letting Go, moving into death – Cara Heafey

Our bodies are so fragile Our time here is so brief Our lives are but a single drop in the ocean of eternity And yet… We are known We are loved We are held May our fears about our death be transformed And may all our suffering be transfigured. May we discover, within ourselves, a […]

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Eddies in the current of life — Jim Burklo, USA

Along the dirt path, past golden grasses nodding in the breeze and stubby juniper trees studded with pale blue-green aromatic berries, through narrows the water rushes, falling over steeps in smooth sheets. Around bends it tumbles, creating backflows that spin into eddies. We are whirlpools in the stream of the universe, eddies consisting of eddies […]

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Funerals

What words do we share at a funeral or memorial service? With what words do we celebrate life? Who writes them? Who says them? Who hears them? Resources for funerals & memorial services listed alphabetically:  

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Hope — Marcy Gansler Hauser, USA

I remember thinking to myself that losing my son could be a cloud over the rest of my life, or he could be the light in my life. I made a conscious decision to hope. Hope is what gets us out of bed each morning. Hope is what has us peering around the corner to […]

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Fallen into Hope, an autumn prayer — Ana Gobledale, UK

Thoughts upon watching a small child dance with a handful of fallen leaves Fallen Wind-blown Brittle Cracked, cracking An autumn leaf Lifted in the fingers of a child Awed at the brilliance of fire orange And the prominent vein tracks Held high During the dance Twirling Eyes upturned to the heavens Delight In the face […]

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Walking through the valley — Ana Gobledale, UK

Walking through the valley of the shadow of death… Death accompanies us all. Waiting silently for acceptance. Not frightening, except for those who fear shadows. Peaceful. I’m grateful for those who show me how to transition from the life we know into this unknowable mystery. So many names and angles of understanding: eternity, resurrection, dust-to-dust, […]

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Now, for this space — Jeanne Lohman, USA

Words to still the soul… Now, for this space, I put them all aside, the awesome things for which no words will come. Such grief must go where only God is guide. Our lovely plane darkens. Nightmares ride. The sunlit waters thicken into scum. Now, for this space, I put them all aside. I read […]

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Walking with Death — Ana Gobledale, UK

‘Until we meet again; don’t know where, don’t know when.’ Death accompanies us all. Waiting silently for acceptance. Not frightening, except for those who fear shadows. Peaceful. I’m grateful for those who show me how to transition from the life we know into this unknowable mystery. So many names and angles of understanding: eternity, resurrection, […]

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Tis a Fearful Thing ― Yehuda HaLevi, Spain

‘Tis a fearful thing to love what death can touch. A fearful thing to love, to hope, to dream, to be – to be, And oh, to lose. A thing for fools, this, And a holy thing, a holy thing to love. For your life has lived in me, your laugh once lifted me, your […]

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Transforming our fears — Cara Heafey, UK

Our bodies are so fragile Our time here is so brief Our lives are but a single drop in the ocean of eternity And yet… We are known We are loved We are held May our fears about our death be transformed And may all our suffering be transfigured. May we discover, within ourselves, a […]

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Death’s welcome — Ana Gobledale, UK

Written in Salisbury Cathedral while listening toSt Matthew’s Passion by JS Bach and preparing a funeral service. Death Ceasing to be Becoming what? Breathless Containing all life Life-less Moving from Moving toward Leaving Arriving Shutting down It is finished Dust on the mantle Ash on the hearth Carried on zephyr puffs Lifted Unknowing Fear not […]

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What lies beyond death? — Cara Heafey, UK

We wonder what lies beyond death. Perhaps nothingness? May it be a great expanse of freedom. Perhaps sleep? May you rest in peace. Perhaps reunion? May those you have loved, for whom your soul aches, be waiting to greet you. Perhaps belonging? May it bring an end to all loneliness and separation. Perhaps completion? May […]

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Contemplating our final journey — Cara Heafey, UK

As we contemplate our final journey We face our deepest fears And recognise all that we long for. The whole of our lives has been bringing us to this point, The point of departure A threshold. Do not be afraid of the darkness. Let it enfold you like a blanket. Your ancestors have gone ahead […]

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Hopi Prayer — Mary E. Frye

Do not stand at my grave and weep. I am not there, I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning’s hush I am the swift uplifting […]

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Prayer for approaching an horizon, St Edith Stein

Appropriate for sharing with the dying, at a funeral, crematorium service or at a memorial service       O my God, fill our souls with holy joy, courage and strength to serve you. Enkindle your love in us and then walk with us along the next stretch of the road before us. We do […]

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Blessing as one nears death — Cara Heafey, UK

May you greet each day as a gift And look for the treasure within it. May the story of your life hold meaning, For you and for those who will follow. May you have time enough to say all that needs to be said; To do all that needs to be done. May your relationships […]

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Nearing Death

What words do we use to comfort and strengthen those who are nearing death?       Resources providing words for sharing with the dying and their loved ones:  

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